So I rolled my ankle and tore a ligament on Thursday night at bball. It wasn’t even a serious game, as the other team forfeited because some of their players were stuck in traffic. No ref. No scoring. Yet I go and injure myself! Insert ‘lame’ jokes here.
As a result, I’ve got myself a mattress on the loungeroom floor and a lot of marking to do. Perhaps I’ll take some more codeine and drink half a bottle of wine, whynot?
McNeil and I have SO much in common. Perhaps we’re meant to be together.
Lezzie model, Catherine McNeil. YUM.
Come Not When I am Dead
To drop thy foolish tears upon my grave,
To trample round my fallen head,
And vex the unhappy dust thou wouldst not save.
There let the wind sweep and the plover cry;
But thou, go by.
Child, if it were thine error or thy crime
I care no longer, being all unblest:
Wed whom thou wilt, but I am sick of Time,
And I desire to rest.
Pass on, weak heart, and leave me where I lie:
Go by, go by.
Back at school today. Luckily there weren’t any kids. I’m not sure where my passion to liberate young minds has gone but I feel only impending dread. My eyes sting like they’re made of wasps and I haven’t done anywhere near the planning I should have. This profession is about being agile, being a performer, walking tightropes and guilt. Guilt. Guilt. Guilt.
I found that Woolworths girl’s dress. Sass and Bide. Only $79.95 but was wayyyy to skin-hugging for me. I bought this instead but it’s too tight around my ribs and I think I have to take it back. Sigh.
I’m reading Fingersmith; it’s divine and it’s calling. Night night.
They are knocking this outfit but I actually like it. 90’s 90210 or not. Tacky stockings can be hot.
There you are. You’ve been on and off all day. I have wanted to message you but I am too stubborn. In October last year, I was thinking I was going to jump back into you and do another move. I was up for it but you didn’t text back.
We never talked about what happened. We just said a rushed goodbye in some vegetarian restaurant and that was that. Maybe you saw in my eyes that I would always be on high alert for you and you decided once and for all that you didn’t want that. I know I was always the risk-taker with us and that even allowing a phone call to talk about it was allowing an inlet to hope when hope had ruined us before…. but I would have liked a phone call. I would have liked a chance to discuss the last three years. To discuss whether we had changed shapes. To discuss whether being the love of each other’s lives still means anything.
This is all because of that damn movie. And because everyone around me seems to be falling in love for the first time. It’s gross and it’s making me think about ghosts.
